The List Continues

23. For the ability to serve, even if it's only spaghetti to a one-year-old.

24. For beauty in the ordinary

 25. For a husband who makes time

Very grainy pic, but I treasure this moment 

26. That this face was only fleeting

Dang, son. Dang.

 27. For paint that washes out

28. For the signs of a creative life

29. For our time together

30. For the quiet light of early fall

 31. For every once in a while with Polynesian sauce

 32. For helping others spend money at Target

33. For being given a pumpkin spice iced latte for helping others spend money at Target

 34. For fall that comes rolling in

35. For frozen shrimp. Really.

Adding to the List

14. Peaceful car rides

 15. Sky that reaches forever

 16. Beauty behind barbed wire

 17. Unnamed weed that billows like clouds of smoke unfurling from a fire, or powder escaping Amadeus' wig, or firecrackers exploding

 18. River that flows in drought

 19. A lush, secret lawn

 20. Bathing my son in a riverhouse sink

 21. Sound asleep down dark country roads lit only by the moon (and mama's flash bulb, of course)

Making a List

I write them out, the things I need.

Groceries.

Clothes for William.

Things for our house.

Instructions for taking care of William.

Because when they're written down, they are a reminder. A reference point. Details that are hard to remember in the muddled chaos of everyday are clearer, sharper, undeniable even, when they are written down.

What if I wrote a list of moments I love, no matter how small? Of moments of common grace? I started today.

This is not an Oprah's gratitude journal (not that there's anything wrong with that, though). This is not an exercise in just being grateful. This is more. It's an intentional effort to find, identify, and exalt God's grace to me. This is me seeking Him and trying to figure out how to find joy in ALL he gives me. I am reading Ann Voskamp's One Thousand Gifts. Don't be dissuaded by the very feminine book jacket. This  is a book for everyone. Can you name a thousand specific ways He has revealed His love for you in your daily life? I want to be able to. 

I know He is good. I can say it in the face of death. I can say it in the throes of labor pains. What I want is to surrender my plans for His. I think it starts with giving thanks. I am starting small. Today I listed 13 things.

Number 8. The memory of this day. Christmas shopping with William, his little sleeping face pressed against me. His snores as I shopped.

"A lifetime of sermons on 'thanks in all things' and the shelves sagging with books on these things and I testify: life-changing gratitude does not fasten to a life unless nailed through with one very specific nail at a time. Little nails and a steady hammer can rebuild a life -- eucharisteo precedes the miracle. I snap a picture of cheese." -One Thousand Gifts