Storing Up Love

William, I can't explain it. As you grow up, a thousand times you will hear parents say, "Once you have a child, you will understand." And it's true. There are so many things you can't understand about love and hurt and being vulnerable until you have a child of your own. 

I ask you every day when you're in my arms, or when I laugh at your silly screeches and babbling and bubble blowing, "Do you know how much I love you?" I have loved you from the very beginning.  This mama says it well:

"Not from the moment I first saw them. Not at the sound of their first cries. Not even when I felt that first turn in my belly. No, love builds more slowly than that. Love begins before we know each place to put it. I've loved them both since the moment their father smiled my way. From the moment I first eyed the ocean, first tasted pomegranates. From that first day my mother held me in her arms. Love stretches backward, rolls forward, and when it finds its mark, unfolds in every direction, like the sky, like heaven." 

-Pauline Knaeble Williams